children

Okay, I know this is a reoccurring theme with me but it is something I feel rather passionate about. Last night I went out to a restaurant with some other women. Half of them I had never met before. People are always surprised when they find out I have children, ages 11, 13 and almost 2. Their first question to me is always, "Was she a surprise or was she planned?" My response was that we were always open to more & have never used artificial birth control. One of the women's responses caught me off guard as she asked if I am Catholic. Well, yes I'm Catholic but I still don't think it has much to do with my decision. I am not opposed to artificial birth control. What I am opposed to is people deciding on their own, apart from God how many children they will have. This happens so often, equally as much among christians where they make the decision on their own to have only one or two kids and they don't even think to consult God on the issue. I think the reason for this is because we have the wrong attitude regarding children. We see them more as a right instead of a gift. This is also why people that can't have children end up turning to invitro or other artificial means to conceive. Children are seen more as a piece of property and a right.
Everyone is familiar with the Duggers, the family that has 17 kids. Now, it takes a special person to have that many kids. Personally, I don't think I could do it but I have a lot of respect for them. There is one thing I like that Mrs. Dugger says when asked if she thinks they have too many children. She answers by asking if there could be too many flowers in the world.
I think it is awesome that God allows us to share in his creative power and bring a being into the world that will go on to live into eternity. I still want to use wisdom and seek his direction on timing but I also want to be open to how many he wants to give me and not take that decision lightly. If he has plans for me to have more that means I will be able to handle it.

God is not always logical

A few months back Tom & I attended a conference where the main speaker was a guy by the name of Graham Cooke. I've been listening to his teachings for about 10 yrs. now & they have been life changing. He is into the prophetic but most of all is REALLY big on character & talks alot about how God uses trials to mold us into his image. Anyway, at this last conference he talked about how God doesn't always call us to do the logical thing but often our logical mind can get in the way of what he wants to do. He also talked about how in this coming year many of us would be called to do things that didn't seem to logical. I've been thinking about this & it is definitely fitting for Tom & I right now. If you think about it, it doesn't seem too logical that we would work so hard to get where we are, training & planting a church & leave it all to become Catholic. In the natural world it doesn't make much sense but I have complete peace that we are in God's will.

Another area I have been sorta wrestling w/ God about is the area of more children. Logically it makes no sense that I would be willing to put my body or my family through another pregnancy. In fact I dread the thought of it! Even though God saw me through them & got me to term he allowed me to suffer & I was quite misserable! I feel pretty confident however that there are at least one or two more little Ponchaks in the future. I guess 9 months is nothing compared to a new life that will go on to live into eternity though. We'll see what happens....